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Sunday, September 29, 2013

Is it Just Me?

Lately I just cannot seem to stay ahead of the house work.  Okay, well, not just lately, I guess since I had kids, so ummm, 16 years!  I can vaguely remember my mother-in-law coming to visit when I was pregnant with Mitchell, my first born, and I was scrubbing the floors and apologizing for the "mess". And I distinctly remember her saying, "Wait until you have kids, then you will know what a messy house will look like."  And I was still so young, naive and smug, and I thought, just because I have kids, my house will never get messy.  Boy, like I said, young, and naive!

I feel like if I do any writing during the day, then the housework suffers, and if I do housework then no writing gets done.  Add in my part-time job doing recruitment for McMan for foster care, the kids busy schedules, Tim being away more than he is home, and every day errands and demands, and there are some days that no housework OR writing get done.  And the guilt is ridiculous.  I can go to bed at night and be thinking that I should have done at least 5 more things, or I should have returned more emails, or damn, I was suppose to call about that appointment.

I use to be that mom that had craft time, reading time, and cleaning time.  But that was before I started exploring my desire to write again, take on a part-time job, volunteering, and running with the kids. And while we have always been the type of family that is busy, lately it feels like I have no balance.  It feels like every day is just "busy", with no time for such frivolous things as reading, lunches with the girlfriends, or exercise....yep, those things feel like luxuries.  I can remember when we first got married spending a whole day just reading sometimes, and my house would still be clean, and homemade cookies in the cookie jar.  So the question has to be asked, is it just me?  Are my priorities screwed up now, or is life just busier for everyone?

This week I am starting a blogging challenge, where I have to post something every single day for 30 days.  I am hoping the challenge will help me figure out how to fit my blogging into my life on a more consistent basis.  Consistency....I guess that is what I need for my writing, my housework, and my luxuries.  It is making me sad again lately that I am not reading more, that I keep saying to my friends that we should "do lunch" but then never get around to it....and it saddens me that there is always freaking housework, lol.  Maybe if I just work more, I will finally afford that ultimate dream, a maid to clean for me!

What are you going to do this week to challenge yourself?  Do you have balance in your life, and are you fitting things in that you enjoy?  These are all things that I keep, just need to be more consistent!

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