Follow by Email

Thursday, October 10, 2013

Why do we care?

A few weeks ago I got an email from a friend, and I won't go into all the details, but she shared that she was concerned that people would think she was "big on herself" for something that she was doing.  Another friend was concerned that people that her house was "too perfect" and they felt uncomfortable visiting.  I often have the opposite concern, and worry that people will judge me for the clutter in my house, and the piles of papers that seem to gather on one stupid little table in my kitchen.  Over the years I have heard women not enjoy an event because they are worried about what others think of A)what she wore, B)what she brought for food, or didn't bring, C)and whether she was smart enough to carry on a conversation.

We worry about what everyone else thinks way too much.  And I know, we say that we don't care, or that it doesn't bother us, but I think we all do care...well, women anyway.  My husband seems to have the crazy ability to ever seem to notice or care what others think.  And he is proud of that, even putting this now favourite pic up on his facebook as the cover.
Some days I tell myself that I don't care what people think, and I think for the most part I live my life how I want to live my life.  But I have to admit, there are days that I worry way too much about why someone doesn't seem to like me, or I try to figure out what I might have done to upset them.  It bothers me so much, that a few times over the years I have asked people who seem to not like me why they didn't...sick right?  There is a little part of me that I keep trying to push down, and that is that I have always been one to be a people pleaser, and it at times, drives me nuts that I can't seem to keep it under control.  People that have treated me badly over and over still seem to be a part of my life....well, not all of them, but you know what I mean.  But I am way better than I use to be, and I have even taken to block people who just seem to have negative comments on my Facebook all the time.  You are laughing, but it took me a while to not care about such things.

Besides, I think if we all start to not care about what others think what will our society be like?  We would be a bunch of ego centric people who don't volunteer, donate or pay attention to what others need.  I guess there is a fine balance, and it seems like I am talking about balance a lot lately.

Ironically this rant comes from someone telling me that I think too much, and I am still trying to figure out if that is a good thing or a bad thing?  And why do I care?

No comments:

Post a Comment